Gentle Reminder: Stay on Your Path

The path to a peaceful, normal relationship with food can be long and twisting.

And many things can try to pull you away from it.

Maybe someone at work raves about losing weight on the latest diet and you consider joining them for yet another “quick fix” attempt.

Maybe you go clothes shopping and nothing fits well or looks right, and you decide your body is to blame.

Maybe someone snaps a photo of you and your Inner Bully has a field day pointing out all your “defects”.

There’s one thing, though, that’s perhaps more disheartening than anything else.

You’re feeling better about yourself because your eating is improving and you’re developing healthy self-compassion. Excited at beginning to feel in charge of your life you decide, even though you feel vulnerable, to share some of your therapy process with a friend or family member.

However, instead of being met with words of support and encouragement, what you hear is “well, it’s obviously not working, you haven’t lost any weight”.

In a heartbeat, they dismiss everything you’ve achieved.

In a split second, they threaten to undermine all the courageous work you’ve done: healing from negative experiences; connecting to your feelings; defining your personal boundaries; strengthening your self-esteem; tuning into your true needs and wants; dismantling your diet mentality and normalising your relationship with food.

They might as well have punched you right in the gut.

There will always be people who, rather than caring about what’s going on inside you, are only ever concerned about what’s outside of you.

Don’t let other people’s ignorance or insensitivity throw you off course.

You know how far you’ve come and you know where you’re going.

Trust yourself.

Stay on your path.

***

To help you stay on your path, here’s a reminder of the principles of intuitive eating.

Food for Thought: To Be Nobody But Yourself

“To be nobody but yourself – in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make you like everybody else – means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting.”

– e.e. cummings

In a world that says we must compare, correct and conform, this e.e. cummings quote – written decades ago – has, surely, never been more relevant.

There’s so much pressure for us to look the same, act the same, be the same.

Sometimes it’s hard to assert our uniqueness because we risk rejection.

But there’s such power in being nobody but ourselves.

Continue reading “Food for Thought: To Be Nobody But Yourself”

Food for Thought: Learning Just To Be

“Finding the lesson behind every adversity will be the one important thing that helps get you through it.” ― Roy T. Bennett

Somebody tweeted the other day that if we don’t use our time on lockdown to learn a new skill, start a “side hustle” and gain more knowledge, we lack self-discipline.

I have a problem with this kind of thinking.

My bingeing days may be well behind me but, like many people who binge eat, I have a tendency towards busyness and achievement.

Continue reading “Food for Thought: Learning Just To Be”

What Can Lockdown Teach Us About Binge Eating?

I want to start by expressing my heartfelt gratitude to all the medical professionals (both frontline and behind the scenes) currently working, at great personal risk, to care for the sick. I’d also like to thank all those carrying out essential services – collecting our rubbish, stacking the shelves, delivering our orders – for their hard work and dedication at such a difficult time.

Thank you. All of you.

The rest of us are playing our part by staying at home in an attempt to stop the spread of the disease. And it seems that some of us are struggling with the lockdown, while others are enjoying it.

Continue reading “What Can Lockdown Teach Us About Binge Eating?”

Expert Insight: A Gentler Way of Dealing with Yourself

“Change happens the way a plant grows: slowly, without force, and with the essential nutrients of love and patience and a willingness to remain constant through periods of stasis.

If change is what you want, you need to find a gentler way of dealing with yourself and others.”

– Geneen Roth, “Breaking Free from Emotional Eating”

Continue reading “Expert Insight: A Gentler Way of Dealing with Yourself”

Why is Change Such a Challenge?

While the process of change never runs smoothly, sometimes it feels like an endless battle with yourself which can wear you down and make you feel like giving up.

So let’s examine some of the reasons why change might feel like such a challenge.

It’s not coming from a helpful place within you
Often the attempt to change is motivated by your Inner Bully who says you’re unacceptable and have to improve to earn your place in this world. Trying to change yourself to please others isn’t healthy motivation and doesn’t work. The only motivation for lasting change comes from an authentic place within that is concerned for your wellbeing and wants the very best for you.

Continue reading “Why is Change Such a Challenge?”