We reach for food when we’re not hungry in order to detach from our emotions. The problem is that in doing so we cut ourselves off from all our emotions, even the enjoyable ones.
The struggle to understand and acknowledge what you’re feeling is an essential part of resolving your issues with food, so working out what brings you pleasure can be a lovely way to start.
One of the traits that people with emotion-driven overeating tend to have in common is that they speak to themselves extremely unkindly. In fact, they speak to themselves in a way that they would never speak to another human being.
“You stupid, fat cow.”
“I hate myself.”
“I’m so disgusting.”
These are just some of the abuse-bombs that people typically launch at themselves. If you do the same thing, please don’t beat yourself up (about beating yourself up).
It’s not your fault.
You may have received a plethora of negative messages in childhood and, consequently, are treating yourself the way you think you deserve. Or years of failing diets, bingeing and weight gain may have decimated your self-esteem. Or both.
It’s my job to help people find autonomy with food.
I’m a psychotherapist who works exclusively with people who overeat. I use the term “emotion-driven overeating” to encompass the overeating spectrum that includes compulsive eating, emotional eating and binge eating disorder.
But why is it important to have an autonomous relationship with food? After all, some would argue that most people have a dysfunctional relationship with food, that there is no “normal”. So what’s the big deal?
Julie de Rohan 