Tag: binge eating disorder

Expert Insight: Soothing with Words and Compassion, not Substances

A heart shape outlined by white powder on a dark wooden surface.
~ Julie de Rohan, eatonomy® ~ 25 Comments

“The fundamental problem is that if we have not been appropriately soothed and have not had carers who have sufficiently helped us to manage our feelings, we are likely to have great difficulty managing them as we grow up and in adult life*. We badly need the skills of emotional regulation because otherwise we are at the mercy of our feelings…

Many people, of whom you may be one, self-soothe not with words and compassion but with substances and activities. The compulsive exerciser is making himself feel better by his exertion; the drug addict or problem drinker is using substances to escape from feelings he can’t manage; the person with disordered eating is using her preoccupation with food, weight, shape and size to deal with feelings that she doesn’t know how to manage in any other way.”

Julie Buckroyd, “Understanding Your Eating”

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How Do You Soothe Yourself Without Food?

~ Julie de Rohan, eatonomy® ~ 24 Comments

Trigger warning: binge eating.

Back in my binge eating days, I’d often hear a soothing little voice in my ear.

If I was having a tough day at work, the voice would whisper: “it’s OK, pick up some food on your way home”. Like co-conspirators, the little voice and I would plan the binge I’d have later.

Planning was part of the bingeing ritual and looking forward to it helped me get through the day. I’d feel excited as I imagined all the food I was going to eat. All those “bad” and “naughty” things I felt I wasn’t allowed because I was firmly entrenched in a diet mindset.

But the little voice gave me permission. After all, it told me I was having a difficult day and food would make me feel better.

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Food for Thought: Finding the Sanctuary Within You

A pink sunset sky with two mountain peaks whose reflections can be seen in the still water of the lake beneath them.
~ Julie de Rohan, eatonomy® ~ 29 Comments

“Within you, there is a stillness and a sanctuary to which you can retreat at any time and be yourself.” – Hermann Hesse

If we’re so used to experiencing inner turmoil rather than inner peace, it’s hard to believe there might be a calm place within where we can find refuge.

A major reason for binge eating is to gain relief from the chaos inside.

We turn to food to quiet our fretting minds and soothe our jangled nerves. Eating offers us a time out from feeling stressed and overwhelmed.

But it’s only ever a temporary vacation from our troubles. And what follows – physical discomfort and self-loathing on an epic scale – ensures the holiday wasn’t enjoyable.

Food can never give us the peace we crave.

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Expert Insight: Looking the Wrong Way

A signpost at sunset with "you are here" written at the top, below it three signs reading "self-loathing", "bingeing" and "poor body image" point to the left, a larger sign pointing to the right says "eatonomy".
~ Julie de Rohan, eatonomy® ~ 8 Comments

“Body image is quite independent of physical appearance. Someone with high self-esteem tends to view her body favourably, regardless of how she actually looks.  

The weak connection between body image and physical appearance means that changing your looks won’t guarantee a lasting improvement in self-esteem…you need to get past your appearance and focus on your other personal strengths as well.”

Rita Freedman, “Bodylove”

It may come as a surprise that body image really has nothing to do with how you look.

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What’s the Downside of Daydreaming?

The interior of a limousine window, through which a crowd of paparazzi cameras can be seen.
~ Julie de Rohan, eatonomy® ~ 27 Comments

As you elegantly step out of the limousine onto the red carpet, cheers instantly erupt from the waiting crowd. You reward them with a dazzling smile while the night sky lights up with hundreds of flashes from paparazzi cameras.

In one perfectly manicured hand you hold the new diamond-encrusted phone Apple designed especially for you. In the other, you clutch the Oscar you won the night before for Best Adapted Screenplay of your own best-selling novel (your legendary acceptance speech was both hilarious and moving, by the way).

Your phone rings. It’s Adele. What? She wants to duet with you on her new album? Well, how could you refuse? You’re not sure how you’ll squeeze it in, what with addressing the United Nations, the fitting for your new Marvel superhero costume, and collecting your Nobel Prize in Stockholm. But sure, Adele, anything for you. Suddenly, you hear a loud voice say:

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Season’s Bleatings: Dodging Diet Talk

The words "Season's Bleatings" with a group of sheep in a field, one in the foreground asks "how many calories are in grass?", another replies "seriously Marigold?".
~ Julie de Rohan, eatonomy® ~ 17 Comments

At a Christmas party, two guests are standing by the buffet. One has their plate piled high with food. The other has cleverly taken a Buffet Tour and has selected only the food they really wanted. The first guest is eating very quickly, the other is taking their time and savouring their selection.

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