Why Am I Doing This To Myself?

After I’d finished yet another secret binge.
After I’d made myself feel sick from the vast quantity of food I’d eaten.
After I’d told myself how weak and pathetic I was.
After I’d said I hated myself with utter conviction.

As I sat alone in physical and emotional pain, this is the question I would ask over and over again.

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What’s The Big Deal About Exercise?

“I’m just one of those people who hates exercise”. That’s what I used to say. And I believed it. Man, did I hate exercise. I felt angry (and guilty and ashamed) at the mention of the word and, I have to confess, I’m worried some of you may stop reading this post for the very same reason, but I hope not.

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What Does Dieting Do To Us?

Uh-oh, it’s January.

The time of year when, even if you’ve been doing really well normalising your relationship with food, you can suddenly find yourself bingeing again.

Why? Because in January it’s impossible to escape the barrage of adverts for slimming clubs, weight-reduction schemes and meal replacement products. Social media is abuzz with the latest celebrity eating plans, while endless newspaper and magazine articles try to convince us of the new wonder diet “that really works”.

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Who Are You?

Excluding how you look, who are you? Take a minute to think about it, even if it makes you feel uncomfortable.

Are you drawing a blank? If so, you’re not alone. Generally, people with overeating issues have little or even no idea who they really are. They’re so focused on what’s outside of them – their appearance – that they rarely consider what’s going on inside. They’re also very quick to dismiss their positive qualities and yet are world champions at identifying their supposed “defects”.

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What’s Your Pleasure?

We reach for food when we’re not hungry in order to detach from our emotions. The problem is that in doing so we cut ourselves off from all our emotions, even the enjoyable ones.

The struggle to understand and acknowledge what you’re feeling is an essential part of resolving your issues with food, so working out what brings you pleasure can be a lovely way to start.

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Why Are We Rebellious?

It’s my experience that people with emotion-driven overeating issues don’t like being told what to do.

Maybe a work colleague asks “should you really be eating that?”
Maybe your partner is putting pressure on you to lose weight.
Maybe a “well-meaning” friend is always suggesting a new fad diet.
Maybe your parent says “don’t you think you’ve had enough?”

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Why Should We Make Friends with Our Feelings?

Feelings. Yuck. Murky things that make us feel really uncomfortable.

To people with overeating issues, feelings are about as welcome as a dog in a game of skittles.

Our natural inclination is to run from our emotions, to avoid them like the plague. They’re so ambiguous, unsettling and uncertain. And we don’t like uncertainty. We like to be in control and know what to expect.

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Why Is It Usual To Feel Conflicted?

“I just want to lose weight”.

If you’re overweight you probably hear yourself say that a lot. Sometimes it might feel like the extended dance mix is playing on a loop in your head with repeated choruses of “I hate myself, I’m so disgusting”.

With such conscious thoughts, it’s easy to believe that all you want is just to lose weight and if you could do that (ideally instantly) then everything would be OK.

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